Wednesday, November 25, 2020

Felicitations From Fairhope #10

Felicitations From Fairhope #10

25 November 2020

 

Hello there… Rodger French here.

 

You know those “end of the year” emails we all get from time to time, the ones that summarize the entire year and chronicle - in great detail - what the kids are up to? Sure you do, and I want it known that I value receiving them since it indicates that somebody out there has enough regard to think that I might actually read them. Which, of course, I do.

 

But 2020 has been an absolute shitshow and, until January 20, 2021, President Trump (loser of not one, but two nationwide popular votes) will continue wiping his blood-stained hands on the White House curtains, hosting “Super Spreader” holiday events, and issuing pardons like a fat, orange Pez dispenser. So I figured I’d get a jump on things in hopes of bending the time continuum ever-so-slightly in the direction of better days to come. Because, why not.

 

A Short, but Brief Recap of 2020 Highlights.

 

February - Left Roma early to come to the ATL to begin work on “Indecent,” a wonderful beast of a show and a dream gig, at The Theatrical Outfit.

 

March - Opened the play to rave reviews just as the Covid nightmare was starting to sow the seeds of panic. After one week, we had to shut the show down and I still haven’t gotten over it. However, the day after we closed, I packed up the Subaru and hauled ass to Fairhope, AL to get back to A.J., who, retiring from her State Department gig, had managed to get on one of the last flights out before the Italians shut down their country.

 

[Viral Background Sidebar - The Trump and The Covid: Twin pandemics in an awful year; the perfect combination of clueless egotism and relentless nature.]

 

April - Moved into our new old house, where three truckloads of our stuff from three different locations finally caught up with us. The next few months were spent doing household things. You all know the drill. So, on to…

 

September - Hurricane Sally made landfall smack on the Eastern Shore of Mobile Bay with high wind and torrential rain, taking 36 interminable hours to mosey through. We lucked out on any significant damage, but power was down for a week and there are still large residual piles of trees and other debris almost three months later. But wait…

 

October - Hurricane Zeta made landfall smack on the western shore of Mobile Bay. We were spared the worst of it, but communities in Mobile and points north were not so fortunate. Many folks who had barely recovered from Sally were hammered again and the storm surge wiped out a boatload of docks.

 

November - The Biden/Harris ticket won the Presidency by over six million popular votes, with a margin of 74 in the Electoral College, thanks to (mostly Black) voters in Atlanta, Detroit, Milwaukee, Philadelphia, and other actual, you know, American cities. Cheeto Benito can sulk, bitch, piss, and moan all he wants, but he is now officially: A Loser.

 

Sadly, the good citizens of Alabama will be represented in the U.S. Senate by Tommy Tuberville (R-Meathead), a failed football coach, career grifter, and ambulatory pork rind. (But if Doug Jones gets a position in the Biden Cabinet? That would be very cool.)

 

[Final Political Sidebar - There’s a Georgia Senate Runoff election on Jan. 5, 2021 and if both Raphael Warnock and Jon Ossoff win, Democrats will control the U.S. Senate and Mitch McConnell (R-Satan’s Spawn) can kindly go piss up a rope. So if you’re eligible to vote in Georgia, do it. If you live somewhere else (for instance, oh, Alabama), send money. And, if you’re a Republican, try reaching out to the other side of the aisle. We’ll wait.]

 

And… that’s a wrap. Probably. Thanks again, and I wish each of you (you know who you are and if you don’t, please ask someone) Happy Holidaze and a Healthy Cold, Flu & Pandemic Season. Let’s hope that this time next year finds us looking back and laughing, with inoculated chagrin, at the depths of American dumbassery. Here’s to 2021, and don’t forget your mask.

 

Stay strong, stay kind, stay alive.

 

Onward.

 

Rodger